Jesus, Lover of my Soul

"Jesus, lover of my soul, let my to Thy bosom fly,

While the nearer waters roll, while the tempest still is high.

Hide me, O my Saviour, hide, till the storm of life is past;

Safe into the haven guide; O receive my soul at last"

Thus sings the first verse of the well known hymn by Charles Wesley, "Jesus, Lover of my Soul". I remember quite vividly when, as a roughly 16-year old follower of Jesus, I was complaining to the assembled family in the car on the way back from church. I, with all the theological wisdom and Christlike maturity of a young teenager who has been really following Jesus for not that long at all, was laying into what I saw as the overtly-sexual, lovey-dovey, and generally girly lyrics of this hymn, which we had sung that morning. I was ranting about the inappropriateness of singing about Jesus as 'lover of my soul', and how I felt that it was just an antique version of modern worship songs that sound like modern love songs.

I was really getting going.

Preaching good.

Then my dad, a much wiser, more biblical, calmer man stopped me mid flow. He - and eventually my mother, and younger sister and brother, challenged me about my attitude. That challenge shocked me, humbled me, and in some ways writing this post is a final admittance that I was wrong that sunday morning several years ago.

I can now say, confidently, as a male, married follower of Jesus that he is the lover of my soul.

There have been various articles shared around recently about men/women and church. Not in the usual controversial sense of leadership, but in general attendance. The first I read recently was "Why Men have Stopped Singing in Church", from the author of 'Why Men Don' Go To Church'. I enjoyed that book, and have appreciated a lot of what it says, but am wary of other things. In this new article, however, I'm slightly puzzled at the attitude. I completely get the problem with modern worship, and with the easy temptation to have too much culture and not enough God in our singing at church. I go to a church where I love the modern style, and people sing. Men too. The article was simply mistitled. It isn't about men singing - we should - the issue he addresses is familiarity with the songs we sing. A very good point. But not why men have stopped singing in church.

The second article was one I saw on Twitter today, which irritated me. The Telegraph carried "Why do more women flock to the Church?", and it is an interesting set of observations and ideas. I'd recommend reading it and thinking about it. There is a lot to learn from. But also a few things to sound caution about. And it assumes several things - as does the whole tone of the question 'why don't men go to church?'. The Telegraph article is helpful and raises lots of good points, but I want to jump outside the conversation and ask a different question.

It isn't about men - or women, or children, or anyone else - going to church.

Its about men following Jesus.

This is the fundamental error. We aren't effectively keeping men in church because we aren't effectively leading them to follow Jesus. True, there are some great initiatives like CVM and the London Men's Convention, but by and large we are not articulating in a 'manly' way what it means for a man to say, sing and know the truth, 'Jesus, lover of my soul'. 

I mention following Jesus, knowing Jesus, as the prime and presenting issue. If someone is following Jesus we call them a Christian, and before we get into semantics or say that there are people who are Christians and outside church, we need to be careful. It is possible to exist as a Christian and faithfully follow Jesus outside of a Church - but it is not the ideal. Richard Foster, the great evangelical Quaker writer on spiritual disciplines and prayer - very individual concerns - wrote in his excellent book "Longing For God", that "there are no churchless Christians". I think thats true. Following Jesus results, ideally soon but always ultimately, in being part of his Body, his Bride, the Church.

I don't want my male friends to come to Church. First, I yearn for them to come to know Jesus. And follow him. And all my female and other friends too. Then, I hope, they will come to know the value and importance of Church. Which could lead to an exciting potential gathering of followers of Jesus, a Church, where people want to be and where easy stereotypes do not apply but everyone is being transformed into the image of Jesus God wants them to be.

It took me six years, roughly, to admit I was definitely wrong about my teenage rant on 'Jesus, Lover of My Soul'. Because, bluntly, he is. Before I even had a conception of who Jesus is, before I had even been concieved, the raw Love of God knew me, and sent Jesus to die for me. God love my soul so much  - and the souls of all those he died for - that he died for them. The Bible talks about this sacrifice - paying the price of sin so that we can come to God - as being the greatest form of Love. The Love than which no greater love can be concieved. Jesus is truly the lover of my soul. The Cross demonstrates Love so powerful that it doesn't brush over the problem of sin - because to ignore flaws is not true love - but instead engages powerfully and finally with the problem, breaking the power of sin. 

But it goes on. Because the Christian story, the intervention of God in history, is not just about the Cross. The Death. The Sacrifice. It is also about the Resurrection. The Life. The Eternity. When I put my faith in Christ and his death, he loved my soul. As I walk with Jesus, fumbling and failing, he loves my soul. As I learn to be me, to be Amy's husband, to be a writer and thinker and a dreamer and a worshipper and a reader, he is the lover of my soul. Jesus' Love never stops. Never ends. Never runs out.

You might think this is quite soppy. That I'm emoting on a blog post that started off as a cold rant. I don't think I am. You see Jesus came to save us - but also to transform us. He didn't come just to deal with sin, he came to give us life to the full. And that means change. And beauty. And danger. And all manner of things too wonderful to fit into the first time you hear the Gospel. Jesus transforms people - men, women, anyone - into his likeness. And so our culture-bound conceptions of manhood and womanhood get transformed into his reality. And our culture-bound and sin-dripping understanding of manliness gets smacked down with the simple challenge, that prefix to 'follow me';

"Take up your cross"

The Cross of Jesus, the gateway to Easter and the crux of history, was simultaneously the strongest and most loving thing that has ever been done. If you want to see how to be a true 'man', look at the Cross. If you want to see true Love, look at the Cross. And the the consequences and forgiveness that flow from it  through the Resurrection and the Gospel.

So now I sing, "Jesus, Lover of my Soul", because I know its true, and I'm learning just how good the Love of Jesus is.

In closing, the closing verse of that wonderful hymn;

"Plenteous grace with Thee is found, grace to cover all my sin;

Let the healing streams abound; make and keep me pure within.

Thou of life the fountain art, freely let me take of Thee;

Spring Thou up within my heart; rise to all eternity."