UK Marriage: Modernisation or Mistake?

Today, as had been expected for a while, the Cameron-led Coalition Government of our country revealed its plans for putting Gay Marriage into action in the UK. I, and many others, feel this is not a brilliant idea and that whatever provisions the Government puts in place will be flimsy. Sadly, that was acknowledged by the equalities minister, who basically said she can't control the complexity of the legal situation. I wrote earlier this year, as I was preparing for my own marriage, and researching marriage in general as well as specifically same-sex marriage, on "The Meaning of Marriage?". I believe I answered a challenge to that position in the comments. But on with the announcement from today.

First of all, and please hear me when I say this, this is not an issue of equality. Its not an issue of civil rights. There. Phew. Seriously though. A very small, vocal minority of a minority want to push this through. Anecdotally, of the people I know who would identify as homosexual in some way, a couple are very for it, a few others would like their civil partnerships to be 'converted' into marriages, and several are quite against it. This seems to be the national mood. I may well be completely wrong about that. But this is not an issue of equality. Most pundits fail to realise that under the current legislation, same-sex couples get the same rights as married mixed-sex couples, when they take out a civil partnership. Under the current law, two people of the same sex cannot get married. Until that changes, (which by all means it may well do1) then the popular misconception that there is a difference is in name only. The word is the issue. Regarding rights, equality, and so on, I would urge you to read a Guest Post by a friend of mine, "The Death of Relativism". This issue is not about equality.

Neither is opposing Gay marriage an inherently homophobic position. In my post earlier in the year, "Christianity and Homosexuality: A New Approach?", I acknowledged the frankly epic errors that have been made by some churches in history. But came round to an orthodox approach. For a wonderful demonstration of biblical, authentic preaching you would be hard pressed to do better than listen to my Pastor, John Wright, in the linked pair of talks. All sin is sin, all sinners sin, and all sins are equal. Thats arguably the only true equality. The good news is that sin can be forgiven at the Cross of Christ. The definition of homophobia has shifted. I don't 'hate' homosexuals, I merely hold to some beliefs that people have held for years. Whilst I did blog several large posts on this issue, I'm also committed to marriage as it really is. So I shared (And re-tweeted it again today) this post, "Marriage: Faithfulness Matters", about an excellent campaign begun by CARE, the excellent charity who are part of the Coalition for Marriage.

Earlier today, one of my favourite Christian writers and leaders, Kevin DeYoung, shared an excellent piece  "A Few Things to Consider Before Supporting Gay Marriage". It is superbly written, and I hope people will read the "a few things it is not" before damning it, and paying careful attention to what else he writes in that piece  DeYoung is one of my favourite authors for a number of reasons, not least his brilliant book on decision-making and the will of God, "Just Do Something".

But I return to my title. Politically, its not clear what the Coalition is doing. The public (at least those who can fill in online forms) are not overwhelmingly for gay marriage, and my initial misgivings about the consultation seem to have come true, as this Telegraph article observes, that the Government has ignored what the British people have said. Cameron wants this to be his legacy - but its seems as though his legacy will result in electoral loss. There are likely around (over) 100 Tory MP's set to rebel, and there are dozens of reports of constituents furious about the way this is being pushed through. After a call from Stonewall for religious people to say 'what they really think', I was somehow both saddened and amused by the event that led to this post, "Could Stonewall Be Wrong?". I think that question could be expanded to a statement about the government. This modernisation drive may well make Cameron and the Tories appeal to more modern people - but they will lose their core, and many others. I'm related to one local Tory councillor who will cease to be a Tory, and likely take their supporters and canvassers with it. Cranmer, in his usual concise and excellent style, has written a superb post about how Cameron is not only "Redefining Marriage, but Constricting Conservatism"

What, then, can we actually do? Well, first and foremost, we can be praying. Next, regardless of whether we personally voted for them or not, our MP's are meant to represent us. So lets write to them. But above all, lets be charitable, gracious, welcoming and considerate to those we disagree with. If we are in churches - especially if you lead a church - lets build communities of faith and discernment that welcome all, because Jesus did, and then have a hope, saying "come as you are, don't stay as you are". Because what matters is what Jesus does, has done, and is doing. Redeeming sinners, changing lives, transforming his people into his likeness.
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For further reading on this issue, I'd point you in the direction of a popular post, "UK Marriage: A Roundup", which brings together strands and ideas as diverse as PinkNews, the disestablishment of the Church of England, Social Justice and so on. Thankyou for reading, I would welcome your comments, suggestions, and links.

Christians can (unfortunately) and do have wildly differing understandings of what the Bible says about sex and marriage - two recent books demonstrated this more than usual, as I observed in this post, "Fundamentally Different". I'd also direct you to an interesting analysis of some statistics on this issue, regarding Anglican attitudes to same-sex marriage.